To be completely honest every time I read something that is so against spanking it gets me angry. Spanking is not child abuse. It never was and never will be; however, beating a child senseless in the name of "discipline" is child abuse. I was abused. The difference? I watched my mother and brother get beaten regularly and was beaten myself when I did nothing wrong.
Thank you. Now I'm going back to my corner of the world that makes sense.
*Approaches 2 years later in a black hooded robe* I like a place that makes sense. Might I join you? If you permit it, I must ask, how many other people are in this corner of the world? Are we alone here? I hope that is not the case.
I'm sorry that you had to go through such horrendous abuse. However I disagree. I'm pretty sure that every abusers would have some sort of rationalizations - that doesn't make any less of an abuse. I'm amazed that people are not even admitting the possibility of it being abuse, they take it for granted that kids can't be raised without spanking. I agree, it's not the same level as your experience for instance, but I don't think that makes it any more justified.
I... Don't completely agree. This person makes it sound like that, in all cases, when you touch your child while angry, it is automatically child abuse. No. Children sometimes do bad things. It is when they repeat those bad things, I will take bullying as an example, is when you really do need to teach them something about what they are doing to that other person, a whole 'taste of your own medicine' sort of thing. This will not make you love your child any less. They aren't automatically going to know how to do things, and even if you tell them, they can still be horribly curious. This, however, does not mean they should be stifled, they need to form their own opinions. All you can do is teach them right from wrong the best you can. Now, child abuse, however, is striking a child from pure anger or without reason. It can also take the form of denying the child the only thing they may actually own; opinion. ...Just needed to clear that up.
And spanking child is NOT necessary to teach them right from wrong. Neither does spanking guarantee that they'd refrain from such acts, that might well scare them into not being open with the parents. I can't believe this is still being justified in the name of "discipline".
...What? Spanking? No. I meant just physical discipline as in restraint. Although spanking isn't going to cause your kid to not trust you or go mental, I can assure you. The only reason I made that comment was because so many people are getting hyped up over how a parent should be a parent recently, and any form of 'non-loving touch' seems to arouse a shout-fest of 'child abuse you are not fit to be a parent' and such. Child abuse should not be taken lightly, but it should also not be used as an excuse to go over-bounds and into people's opinions.
(...Now someone else is going to get mad at me and take it wrong, great.)
"Although spanking isn't going to cause your kid to not trust you or go mental, I can assure you. " I wonder on what basis you're claiming this? Because the purpose of spanking itself is to scare kids to such an extend that they may deter from the action in the future. I'm not sure how kids could be completely open to a person that spanks them, and by definition which scares them. At least in most cases, i.e.
As for child abuse and spanking, I wouldn't strictly call this on the same level as child abuse - however it is unnecessary and sometimes detrimental. I will speak against it. You can't draw lines when it comes to spanking and neither can you measure what amount of spanking might psychologically scar the kids. So unless you have overwhelming evidence in favor of spanking being a deterrent, I guess the criticisms are valid (although I hate equating it with child abuse in general).
It's fine. It just unnerves me the way people think that if a child was disciplined when younger, then they 'wont turn out right', as if 'not turning out right' wasn't already a problem to people and their 'society normals.' It just shoves aside autism and the disabled for something that could have actually been prevented. But I guess that was my case that I'm all about, and child abuse is this.
Just to add, I was spanked as a child and I trust my parents. I'm able to talk with them when I need to about somethings. the thing is, and people forget this, is that you need to balance discipline with Non-discipline actions. Spanking is not child abuse.